I like writing. I'm definitely not built for writing fiction, because I genuinely can't come up with stories, and I have no idea how people even have the creativity for it. (I had some of that creativity when I was like, ten, but it's all gone now. I guess when school stops giving you creative writing assignments you just lose the skill.) the kind of writing I think I'm the best at is short-form explainers, which might explain why I gravitate so much towards blog posts.
my first experience with anything similar to a blog was three years ago. I had this little series of interconnected pages on Rentry called “marticles” where I would write about random linguistics-related topics. Rentry isn't even a blogging website — it's just a pastebin website with support for Markdown — but it was popular for writing about-me pages in some circles on Twitter. I originally only intended to use it to write one single post, but I ended up liking it and using it for the other ones as well instead of switching to a proper blogging website, so I basically had all these manually interlinked pastebin pages working as a blog.
most marticles (yes, each single post there was called a ‘marticle’ too. a Mati article yes I am very funny haha) would be written in one sitting. the posts would all be quite short anyway; they'd clock in at about a thousand or so words. honestly, they were all about very “basic” things that you could read about on Wikipedia anyway, so they were mainly interesting to people who don't have a lot of training1 in linguistics.
anyway, I remember that anything that I couldn't write in a span of just one or two days would remain unwritten forever — I wrote them in a very short attention span. I just couldn't bring myself to write the words for the rest of the post if I hadn't already written it in one go (or in two goes, I guess? for some I would try to write them over the course of two days, but that was my limit). I just didn't feel like continuing from where I left off.
honestly, I feel a very similar thing whenever I'm in the mood for Minecraft. everyone at this point knows about the “two-week Minecraft phase”, and I get those as well, but every time I come back I feel like I have to restart the game from zero. I never get past mid-game. I've never killed the ender dragon a single time in my life, and I used to play Minecraft obsessively as a child. I have a problem with continuing things in general... either I do it in one go from start to finish, or I don't do it at all, it seems. this problem also applies to movies, books, anything. I don't have the attention span to watch movies! if you take me to the cinema, I will watch the movie, but only because I am in a place where the only thing I can do is watch the movie. (even then I will scroll on my phone for at least five minutes while I'm in there, and I'll leave the room to get some “rest”.) my boredom at doing any activity for extended periods of time (unless it's fueled by the sheer force of my autism) has been discussed on here before, even.
not being able to keep on with things for extended periods of time also applies to every single one of my projects. for months I've been wanting to write a Lojban textbook, but now that the Lojban autism has kind of worn off, I'll probably never write it at all. and even if it hadn't worn off, and I was coining one word a day like I used to two or three months ago, I just start writing the first two or three lessons of something like that, look at the result, get terribly unsatisfied at how it looks, and then give up on rewriting the whole thing, or continuing with it at all and getting to rewriting it later. people think I would be writing whole books and theses with my Autistic Genius or something but no I can't even write anything longer than five pages bro
getting back to the main topic (this blog) before I ramble on too much about how I will never accomplish anything in my life because I am a failure, though. I should probably add some kind of feature where people can suggest posts on here. a lot of the time I want to write but I don't know what to write about, so I'd either end up just not writing anything and spending three more hours of my life doomscrolling or whatever, or I will write absolute unstructured slop like this entry. I haven't found an askbox app that isn't absolutely terrible yet. maybe I'll add one here if I ever do. but if you'd like to suggest something for the blog you can contact me I guess or just drop a comment on Bluesky mentioning me
anyway here's a song I think is decent. it came out yesterday I like Chogakusei